Tuesday, May 25, 2004
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Today is a terrible day. Well.. maybe i've expected this long ago, and that's why i didnt want to have this day to come? Got my results today... they were horrendous. They really are... haiz~

Failed 4 subjects, 3 with 40+ marks, which means just a little more to passing, and failed Chemistry really terribly even though i had really studied hard for it. And it is actually a miracle for me to score even higher for Physics than for Chemistry, even though i failed my Physics too. Aint im supposed to fail, and that's why Mrs Kong had asked me to take combined science? Maybe i should use this to console myself.

I really had lotsa marks with the number '4'. Well, im being superstitious here, but it somehow reminds me to 'si', which is equals to 'die'. I truly think that i had entered a wrong class, really wrong, i should really have entered an art class instead. Maybe i will do well in it? It is too late to regret now, all i can do now was to really work hard, and try to score for the Prelims. I had no choice ya? ...

Now, although im feeling really moody and sad, i know i cannot express my feelings at home once my mum is at home. Learnt this after i cried after i got my results last year at home, and got a real scolding from my mother. That's why i kept on telling myself not to cry when im on my way home, but to act as if i am happy and felt nothing at all. Feeling really bad now... it is really unhealthy to bottle up your feelings, dont try it. You will only feel even bad. Just felt myself so fake now, to smile when i am real sad inside. I better dont think about it anymore.. i must learn to forget.


leaving...
-5/25/2004 10:54:00 PM-